The Management Consulting Group

Try this. Close your eyes and try to quiet your mind. Do that now, for just a moment. Then return to the page.

Did you notice that quieting your mind was no easy task? Usually, when I try this, I become anxious and agitated. That happens because, without the practice of dis-identifying ourselves from thought, we believe that we are our mind, so it has ultimate sway over our attention. If you find yourself saying, “I don’t think I’m my mind,” guess who said that? Right, your mind!

Now try this. Close your eyes once again, and place all of your attention not on your thoughts but on the sensations you feel in your body. Perhaps you can rest your attention on the temperature of your hands or on the weight of your legs or on the tension in your face. Be careful not to observe emotions, but rather sensations.

If you notice that you’re feeling sad, for example, go deeper into the inquiry, and study what sadness feels like. Pay no attention to what thoughts are associated with the sadness or to the undesirability of the emotion. Just observe where sadness resides in your body. What, in fact, is sadness? Is it tightness in your face? Heaviness in your throat? Fluttering in your belly? Whatever it is, let it be. It’s entirely OK. Study it as you imagine a scientist would study it. Try to dissect it with your consciousness. Notice how long it lasts and how it dissipates, how it goes away, with no mental effort on your part.

Notice how all sensations in or on your body have this same quality. They arise, remain for a time, and then cease. Be kind to yourself. Whatever you feel is OK. In fact, think of the sensations as fuel for your consciousness. What Ram Dass calls “grist for the mill.” There is no prerequisite to enlightenment. It can’t happen in the future. It can only happen now. As Ram Dass says, “Be here now.”

Twelve steps for a simple meditation practice:

1. Sit comfortably in an upright position with your back straight, arms comfortably in your lap.

2. Keep your eyes and your mouth closed.

3. Take three “cleansing breaths,” forgetting your cares.

4. Commit to using this time for self-inquiry, not thought.

5. Focus on your breath as it enters and leaves your nostrils.

6. Don’t try to change anything you notice. Accept it as it is.

7. Give yourself a brief reminder to maintain perfect awareness and perfect equanimity or acceptance throughout this process.

8. Begin to become aware of the sensations over your body. Move your attention up and down your body, uncritically noticing whatever feelings arise.

9. If you become bored, distracted, frustrated, or overwhelmed, realize that these, too, are just sensations. Observe them as you do all other sensations or thoughts.

10. Practice for at least twenty minutes. Do as much as an hour at a time. It’s best to practice both in the morning and in the evening.

11. Use this same practice any time something upsetting or stressful occurs during your day. Bring your attention, as quickly as possible, into your body and away from your thoughts.

12. Remind yourself that you are not your thoughts; you are not your mind.

Because of the habit of your mind to take over, you’ll believe you have to think about this. You don’t. According to the Third Zen Patriarch,

“Stop talking and thinking, and there’s nothing you can’t know.”

I’ve often found it helpful, when my mind picks up a train of thought that it doesn’t want to let go, to remind myself of Barry Weiss’ words. “Your mind will constantly try to fool you into believing that whatever you’re thinking about right now is vitally important.” Don’t let it fool you!

The practice of observing your sensations will lead you towards liberation. You should commit yourself to at least twenty minutes per day, simply observing your sensation, noticing when your mind tries to take over the show and draw you into a thought loop. Whenever that happens, simply smile at the current habit pattern of your mind and return your attention to your sensation. Notice how it flows and changes. Watch how what started as what some might call bad feelings will often melt into good ones. Begin to recognize how feelings you used to suppress or indulge become like clouds moving across the sky. They come, and they go.

As you practice the art of simple observation, what the Buddha called ‘vipassana’ meaning wisdom, a very interesting thing will begin to happen to you. As situations arise in your life which used to cause you to react negatively, you’ll find yourself more and more quickly leaving behind the churning of your mind; the part that says, “This shouldn’t be!” and directing your attention with curiosity and wonder at your inner sensations.

Since you’re learning to experience the temporary nature of your feelings, you’ve nothing to fear and nothing to fix. The problem will take care of itself. In fact, if anything, you’ll appreciate the opportunity to feel the emotion and get in touch with areas of your consciousness in places where you’ve become addicted to certain outcomes. You’ll learn to laugh at yourself and have compassion for both yourself and the people or situations which generated your negativity … all in all, a pretty remarkable benefit for a reasonably meager investment of time.

Dr. Steve Taubman is a hypnotist and physician, and the author of UnHypnosis: How to Wake Up, Start Over, and Create the Life You’re Meant to Live. His writings and teachings guide people in the use of tools of transformation, and bring esoteric spiritual principles down to earth. Learn more about UnHypnosis by visiting http://www.unhypnosis.com

Fangs. Killer claws. Hisses, grrrs…and later, yelps. Who is not
familiar with cat-dog combats? It’s a “hair-raising” party of limbs and tails and yes, the loser sheds most of the fur- mostly, the cat.

It was night time and I was in the living room reading a tear-jerker when I heard a throaty, prolonged and wavering wail. Instantly I dropped the book and rushed to the door with one thought in mind - my cat was under attack. The thought brought an ugly picture to my head. I feared an on-the-prowl Sparky or a hyperactive Caesar or worse, the Big Dogs on the Block (BDOB a.k.a. askal) was circling my Khufu in anticipation of tearing her apart.

So you could just imagine the shock on my face when I caught Khufu chasing Sparky, a dog two times her size. A dog. My cat just chased a dog. I thought it only happens on TV.

“You were supposed to be helpless,” I scolded Khufu but actually I was torn between being proud of the cat and being afraid of it as it sat on its hind, licking its paws…Sparky completely forgotten.

But then my memory bank had retrieved from its archives a plausible explanation about what had transpired in the scene of crime. Said dog seemed to have a phobia with cats for once upon a time it received a blow from a cat’s paw on the head. So I thought my cat was just plain lucky. Sparky would avert from anything that meows.

But then another weird night came and dogs were running for their
tails. The militant cat had struck again.

Dogs. Not one, but two. Dogs- definitely not puppies. One was Caesar and the other was a BDOB- both bigger than Sparky. I was impressed.

Perhaps it would happen again, perhaps not. But I wouldn’t want my feline friend to make it a hobby or she’ll drive all the dogs away.

Here’s the norm: cats are to be chased by dogs. The poor cat must
have gotten tired of running for her life that she decided to make a brave yet an unthinkable move to alter cat life in our dog-infested neighborhood.

It seems she has gathered up her tattered pride and charge, come what may, to make a statement in the name of the feline race. The statement would be: We cats may be soft, but we are not fragile.

How easy it is for us to run away from our fears or to give in to the unfairness of the bullies to avert the hassles and side effects of battle, having known not the possible victories we could achieve…dreams stay as mere dreams.

But fear is fear. If only we could just throw it out of the window and have it locked out from our minds. But fear is a part of our existence. It is a psychological battle, a tug-of-war between yes and no. For me, it is not something we bulldoze in a day. I remember how my cat used to sacrifice her food to the dogs and be rooted indoors. It took her time to gain the courage to go against the norm we thought could never be changed.

Perhaps the passport to courage is to be sure of who we are, to
believe, to act big no matter how small, like the cat that fought for its claim of territory and demand for respect with a personlity bigger than a dog.

We all have our own dogs to chase to turn our “impossible” into a
badge we can proudly wear. As for me, I’m not done with mine yet.

When I feel like I’m really in the flow, everything seems to be moving forward at a nice pace. I have found, though, that when I’m not in the flow that it’s pretty easy to get into it. All you have to do is feel it.

To get in the flow, imagine that you are standing in a river. Feel the current of the river flowing around you. Now feel it going through you. As you feel it around you and through you, feel yourself drift along with it. Allow it move you in the direction you should be going.

Stay with this feeling for as long as you can. When you are ready, open your eyes while trying to keep this feeling going. Know that for as long as you are feeling the flow that you are in the flow. When the feeling goes away, you will still be in the flow. Think about this often during your day.

Now go and do whatever you need to get done. It should go smoothly since you are in the flow.

The more you practice this technique, the easier it will be for you to get into the flow and the more often you will be in it. Life becomes simpler and less stressful. Doesn’t that sound nice?

Over a couple of centuries there was a dispute between two farmers regarding a large, fertile, pristine plot of land located on the other side of a darkened forest and wide raging river. It was eventually purchased and paid for by the prior owner’s blood and those who worked for him. The new owner simply cashed in by the use of more resources and new strategies to purchase properties. Although the prior ownership dissolved; those who worked for the prior owner had no choice but to now work for the new owner; regardless of what he offered. After all, there were young mouths to feed, lives to tend to, and it was this vulnerability the new ownership took advantage. Even more, the new owners promised them their own rows and crops to tend to; if only they would agree to the new terms! Terms that would not last.

The new owners surveyed the land. When the new ownership was finished and of course after consulting with those trusted most, they decided to plant fifty wide, thick rows of corn. The ownership realized how difficult and how much work it would actually require to plow and plant fifty thick, wide, limitless rows of corn. They contemplated that the only way one could possibly plow and seed such a large piece of land, would be if they advertised job opportunities to others on the other side of the community, across the rivers. Soon enough, many came to see this new acreage; and the promises made by the new ownership for those who would work were irresistible. “After you plant and pick your required bags of corn for the day; feel free to pick as much as you want for yourself and your family!” “We assure that your opportunities will be endless.”

It was not long before the land was thoroughly planted and over a season of time and care by all those who invested, who believed and who waited for a promising harvest; they continued to believe and work for their dream.

Just as so many had expected, the corn shoots were the thickest anyone had ever seen. The rows were so green, so clean, so wide, and so valuable to so many. The new ownership soon realized that the planted crops would reap greater wealth than they had ever imagined. There was obviously more than enough to go around; more than enough to fulfill the promises the ownership had made to many as well as the needed purpose of selling their crop to the market for distribution and the obtainment of vast profits.

One night in preparation for the harvest the ownership and their small chosen teams secretly began to walk the rows of corn. As they combed their way through the crops that all had planted they realized there were rows in which did not grow as well as others. Some stalks were not as thick, some not as green, some corn not as yellow. Within their divisive analysis they began mapping out the areas in which were deficient. This plan, this map became method. This ethnocentric idea became interceded within the harvesting plan for all who had worked; for all who had paid with their sweat and blood.

It came time, and new ownership soon began directing workers to certain available rows, and areas in which needed harvesting. It was organized, it was calculated, it was inadvertently orchestrated to meet the goals and purpose of those who now owned the land by force. Few who knew the ownership personally were given copies of the map that would be used to allocate workers to designated rows and areas. Of course these workers obtained a head start on harvesting, gained their designated bags for the day before all others and continued to fill more than their equitable share of the overages abundantly produced for all. The ownership and those few had such an advantage with this information; they began making secret piles of harvested crops and selling it for themselves in a gluttony of food that no one family or small population would ever really need. Their basic needs were met and much more; they needed not to continue taking, but something in their selfish hearts rationalized their infectious arrogance.

The others. Yes, there were many others who did not have the valuable information; they were conveniently left out of the loop. In this convenience; they were even blamed as less valuable, less human, less deserving of a chance, an opportunity, a position in which they could find valuable sections, valuable rows of the crop. Through their frustration and struggle, no matter how hard they worked they always came up short. The few were always in the best areas of the rows first, the few always seemed to collect the best looking stalks, the brightest golden corn, and it was not because they were smarter or better; just informed.

For the many were not angry because they had less than the few. Of course, that is what the few assumed because of their arrogance and their lack of motivation to research facts due to their comfortable lifestyle which made them morally and perceptively weak. The truth however, was that the many came up short in the ability to even feed their families, to save some for later, to feel connected and valuable among all workers. In their obstructed situation they had less opportunity. For so long, the many continued to work with just as much or more vigor than the few…with fewer and fewer crops to show for their labor. As the many brought home less and less and the few, more and more; resentment set in. “How could the many be expected to work as hard or harder, maintain a basic quality of life, and continue picking crops for their new ownership when the vast amounts of workers could not meet their basic needs?” Shelter, food, good health, belonging, etc. and the majority of workers themselves had all been threatened to a weakening end.
Weakness not of the many; but of the few and the system they sought to control and manipulate.

Of course, the few continued to rationalize to why they needed such excessive quantities. They blamed it on something called Capitalism, however; this was not Capitalism but exploitation, not honest but deceitful, not equitable competition but inequity. Larger secret piles and continued access and distribution of locational maps of the property for a chosen few exposed their mission; as the many began to learn of their unequal beginnings. However, the few in their arrogant, self valued lives forgot a golden rule to holding power. They had developed a selfish disease with primary symptoms of amnesia. They simply could not remember to direct others to appropriate field areas to collect enough crops to survive.

They could not recollect how to efficiently create a system in which all could meet their basic needs in order to sustain an effective harvest and a completed, equitable season for all based upon the obvious availability of vast amounts of crops. They forgot their promise. Maybe it was because they thought that others looked differently, were not as capable to do the work, acted different or spoke differently…regardless, they forgot that it takes everyone to harvest a season; and if crops were to be effectively grown and harvested in the future, systemic adjustments in worker distributions would have to be made and education regarding row, crop and field locational maps must be made available to all who work. Although the land was loved by all who worked; not all who worked were loved. This basic humane obligation was ignored…the following season would be barren.

Copyright2005 Compassionpwr@juno.com

See other article bios

Living for the moment seems easy enough, but what if you are feeling hesitant, unhappy, fatigued, or afraid? We all have these feelings, and if they go on without setting controls, they become worry, stress, or depression. Each one of these can cut your life very short or cause a serious health condition.

Unfortunately, I have seen this first-hand when my mother “worried herself to death” at 50 years of age. The day of her funeral, I swore to give up smoking and stop worrying. Well, I did quit smoking, but to quit worrying is an “uphill battle.”

Even the toughest people we know worry. Worrying has been a curse to mankind, even in ancient times, but there are better ways to deal with worries at this time. Here are a few ideas to give you relief from worry and to allow you to start enjoying your life right now.

Get self-improvement audio books that make your heart soar. You need to plug yourself into positive information that creates optimism from within your inner being. There are many good self-help audio books to choose from, and you have to listen to positive ideas many times before they are “permanently wired” into your psyche.

There is a growing number of self-hypnosis audio books for anything, subjects vary from topics such as: “quitting smoking” to “goal setting.” For obvious reasons, the self-hypnosis audio books are not recommended when driving your car. However, they are a good sleep aid, and you could set one up at bedtime. If you make them into a steady routine, you should feel results within a month.

Be productive each and every possible moment. Write down your goals and go after them. Your goals should be specific and should make you feel positive when you think about them. Wake up every day and go after your goals.

Set realistic deadlines that fit into your lifestyle. If you have responsibilities and commitments, allow time for them, and don’t make deadlines into a stressful situation. To get the most out of life, we have to have a full life.

Allow for family time. Nothing is so important that you have to be a stranger to your family. We all need bonding with people we can trust.

Seek advice from a life coach, friend, personal trainer, Yoga teacher, or martial arts teacher. Sometimes we all need a little “pep talk,” but only you know when, and how often, you need to boost your morale. This is not a substitute for medical or psychological counseling, but in the case of preventative health, most of us just need someone to gently push us along.

Some of my most successful clients know what to do, but they also need to have it organized into a system that is “user friendly.” They have also come to understand that you have to work at your goals every day and accept the minor setbacks in life.

Counseling by a physician, psychologist, or psychiatrist, is an option to consider, and there is nothing wrong with getting “professional help.” The family unit is not what it was a generation ago, and people need someone who is qualified to help them. If you need advice from a competent professional, this is a solid option.

Design a plan to help yourself, and stick to it. You can look at this as a starting point.

Paul Jerard is a co-owner and the director of Yoga teacher training at: Aura Wellness Center, in North Providence, RI. He has been a certified Master Yoga teacher since 1995. He is a master instructor of martial arts, with multiple Black Belts, four martial arts teaching credentials, and was recently inducted into the USA Martial Arts Hall of Fame. He teaches Yoga, martial arts, and fitness to children, adults, and seniors in the greater Providence area. Recently he wrote: Is Running a Yoga Business Right for You? For Yoga students, who may be considering a new career as a Yoga teacher. http://www.yoga-teacher-training.org/index.html

I love the sounds of melting snowplink, plink, ting, ting, ting, a staccato drip on sloped metal roofs, the occasional loud crack of a giant icicle, the bubble and gurgle of the mountain brook as it swells and tumbles over polished rocks on its way to the valley below.

I love to gaze at the majestic white peaks with knowing wonder that they will soon morph into greens, oranges, purples, reds and a myriad of ever-changing hues, a dance between the sun, the clouds and the fog, a waltz of beauty and color that never changes partners yet never replays itself, each day a masterful original.

I love the consistency of change, the reminder that in all matters winter never fails to turn into spring, the spring of health, the spring of growth, the spring of a relationship that at points seems as cold and hopeless as the frigid tundra.

Then we usher in summerthe heat, the fire, the passion and the burn, an escalating blaze of sweaty emotions that rise, intensify, crescendo and lead us to the fallthe tumble of all that grew, drifting leaves that blanket us and prepare us for that annual time of reflection when the chill sends us scurrying within.

Winter uncovers spring.

Spring gives way to summer.

Summer melts into fall.

Fall clings desperately to its life lines, like a drunk nursing his last swallow or a child that down to her last bite of ice cream adds water to fill the bowl again, oblivious to the loss of flavor, wanting more where none can be had except in the world of pretend.

Winter sets in regardless, sometimes gently, often with an unleashed fury that shuts us all down without mercy, paralyzes us.
We take cover and hide from its elements.

Still, the seeds lie in sleep, buried below in wait, patient and un-intimidated.

In victory we find the cause for defeat, the fat summer celebration that makes us lazy and lethargic, asleep at the wheel.

In defeat, we taste the bitter dirt that jars us awake, wrestle to get up, find the strength to remember that the only difference between a rut and a grave is its depth.

In defeat we define character, a constant tightrope walk to temper and harden for strength while somehow, some way, clinging to fleeting vestiges of softness, kindness and compassion, elusive companions too often quashed in the fight.

In defeat we discover raw self.

The wise lick their wounds, leave the gashes exposed, observe, re-group, learn, heal and start over.
The foolish grope for the closest band-aid.
Winter doesn’t care.

Wait.
Is that a loan white flake in the air?
Could winter grace us with a few added moments of introspection and preparation, a last gasp of quiet before we reap all that was sown, before the buds reveal themselves and us in this year’s unforgiving tally?
I think so.
We still have time.
Let it snow.

That’s A View From The Ridge…

About The Author

Author Ridgely Goldsborough invites you to subscribe to The Daily Column, a heart-felt collection of stories that inspire hope and courage. Please do so at www.aviewfromtheridge.com.

ridge@aviewfromtheridge.com

Get It Out

When something is bothering you, whether be a family problem or business roadblock, write it down or talk to someone about it. Keeping problems inside only worsen with time. We can never do it all nor solve every problem by ourselves. But we can find solutions.

There is a solution to everything, no matter what. Human drive and passion is what keeps many things from coming to a sound solution. The options are there, you just have to dig around and find them.

Keep a Timeline

Keep a time line or journal of personal and professional accomplishments you cross as they come along. It will server as reminders how you solved things in the past and remind you of your passionate spirit.

Remind Yourself Why

What is your reason for becoming self employed? Freedom or money or giving? Find objects of your affection such as a picture of your family, a nice house you want to buy one day, a charity you want to donate to. Keep these items close by on a wall or on your desktop to server as visual reminders of why you work so hard.

Deal With Problems

Deal with problems as they come along. Map out all solutions you can think of. Then deal with them. Don’t put them off.

Turn Opinions Into Fuel

Let people think what they want. Learn to separate criticism from opinion. Not everyone is going to think your product or service is the best in the world. But I’m sure your product or service will be valuable to someone. Follow your heart and your dream.

You think you are the best, but not everyone is going to agree. Let this statement fuel your drive to keep learning and experimenting.

Valuable Help Sites

http://www.engin.umich.edu/~problemsolving/strategy/crit-n-creat.htm

http://groups-beta.google.com/group/clientcentersnetwor

“Ignore what other people think you like and listen to your heart, it’s your passions in life no one can rightfully criticize.”

Tia is CEO of Client Centers, LLC, an internet and graphic service business based in Florida since 2000. She also runs and maintains http://www.nerdbyte.com

Tia Scott

CEO

Client Centers, LLC

http://www.clientcenters.com

http://www.nerdbyte.com

Have always been struck by how loosely and generously this word has been used. After all, there are many different kinds of American heroes, some pretty obvious, other not so obvious. They come in different sizes and shapes. Ted Williams, as a baseball player, was not a hero except perhaps when he won a game in the bottom of the ninth with a hit. But as a marine pilot who served in two wars, he was. Matinee idols are not heroes; Christopher Reeve, as an actor, was not a hero, but as a living inspiration for others who were similarly disabled, he most certainly was. After he was paralyzed, his wife, Dana Reeve, devoted herself to her husband’s care. The two became activists for the study of spinal-cord therapies, which led them to champion stem cell research, appearing together at the Democratic National Convention in 2004. After Christopher Reeve’s death, Dana succeeded him as chairperson of the Christopher Reeve Foundation. Sadly, after a courageous battle with lung cancer, she died at age 44. Their work and spirit had proven an inspiration for many. To my way of thinking, these two lights of love were true heroes. They will be sorely missed.

Jackie Robinson was such a hero to me when I was a kid that I couldn’t do anything but gawk at him in amazement. He thrilled fans with his daring base running, but far more importantly, he broke through baseball’s rock-solid color barrier and, in so doing, changed the face of a nationand he did this silently and nobly while taking terrible and cruel racial abuse. That he was a great ballplayer was simply icing on the cake. Barry Bonds is not a hero except perhaps when he wins a game in the bottom of the ninth with a tainted hit.

Betty Friedan is generally regarded as one of the founders of feminism’s second wave which helped to expose the sexist underpinnings of America’s post-World War II complacent prosperity. She argued that millions of American housewives found the destiny of mother and housewife stifling, repressive and even dehumanizing. She was a barrier breaker who surely qualified as a heroine. Jane Fonda chose another path of feminism and managed to achieve antihero status, if not infamy, for her trouble.
People in San Francisco told Harvey Milk that no openly gay man could win political office. He ignored them and became the first openly gay man elected to any substantial political office, an extremely heroic act at the time. He was later assassinated (along with Mayor George Moscone) by Dan White. Dr. Martin Luther King and black Islamic leader Malcolm X well knew their lives could be snuffed out at any time even as they escalated their respective causes. Rosa Parks’ simple act of protest galvanized a civil rights revolution in America and was a true hero. Ophra is not a hero even when she gives away cars to her audience. Matinee idol, yes. Heroine, I think not. Charlie Sifford’s steadfastness and golf smarts allowed him to break many of golf’s racial barriers and become the first black to be inducted in the World Golf Hall of Fame. By paving the way for others, he was a hero. Tiger Woods is an icon and arguably may be the greatest golfer ever, but he has yet to qualify as a hero in the true meaning of that term.

The American military personnel who hail from widely different roots but are united by patriotic courage are heroes, for they risk and sacrifice their lives to preserve freedom around the globe. To this end, soldiers and Marines of both genders now serving in Iraq are heroes. Suffice to say the heroes of our many battles and wars are too numerous to cite in this piece.

Closer to home, single parents who work multiple jobs to support their family and send their children to college are heroes, for they possess a quality of character far greater than most, which enables them to perform this truly extraordinary endeavor. The tots and young children in the oncology ward at Philadelphia Children’s Hospital (or any other hospital) awaiting an infusion of platelets to combat leukemia do this with a nobility that brings tears to one’s eyes. They are so very heroic as they fight for their lives.

Labor Leader Cesar Chavez, who in the 1960s became the champion of California migrant farm workers, was a hero; James Hoffa was not. One chose to give, the other took.

And lest we forget the fire fighters and police officers who went into the tower on Sept. 11 to rescue survivors, knowing they were risking their lives. Of course, 9/11 inspired any number of heroic acts, but perhaps none more than that played out on United Flight 93.

“We’re going to do something,” one of the passengers told his wife during a final phone call. Then a group of strangers banded together and took on the hijackers. This much we know, they were big guys; Bingham was a 6-foot-4 rugby player; Glick, also a rugby player and judo champion; Beamer was 6 foot 1 and 200 pounds, and Nacke was a 5-foot-9, 200-pound weightlifter with a Superman tattoo on his shoulder. The last transmission recorded is someone, probably a hijacker, screaming “Get out of here. Get out of here.” Then grunting, screaming and scuffling. Then silence. (Karen Breslau, Newsweek Web ). With the furious counter-attack continuing, the aircraft crashed into an empty field in Shanksville, Penn., only 20 minutes’ flying time from our nation’s capital. All passengers perished. All passengers were heroes.

Until the morning of Sept. 11, heroism was something that America mostly watched in movies or read about in books. Now that Bingham, Beamer, Burnett, Nacke and all the others saved hundreds of lives, they have become real emblems of heroism.

Heroes can be men or women, black or white, gay or straight, privileged or poor, patriots or rebels, fathers or mothers, children or adults. We honor and celebrate them. They are different from the rest of us, and yet they are the same. But I believe what sets them apart is that they provide our inspiration. They demonstrate the high ideals and values that inspire us to go beyond the norm.

“Let’s roll.” Final words of Todd Beamer to his fellow passengers on Flight 93

Ted Sares, PhD, is a private investor who lives and writes in the White Mountain area of Northern New Hampshire with his wife Holly and Min Pin Jackdog. He writes a weekly column for a local newspaper and many of his other pieces are widely published.

Silence means no voice input of any sort. What happens when there is silence? We cannot hear anything from the outside, but the voices inside are what we hear pretty clearly. We can hear ourselves. We can loudly hear to what we think and how we think, if we do.

We do not give much time exploring to who we are, why we are, and how different lives we are connected to, how should we interact, etc. etc. etc.

You can call silence as a great quality time with oneself where one talks with oneself and hear. Do we hear ourselves, it depends.

There are a whole lot of dynamics that are going on in life and so many circles we are moving in, with different dynamics.

It is a common understanding that as we grow we learn and become mature, I have a little disagreement with that, we do learn things but I think we lose a whole lot on the course. I think we lose innocence, we lose trust, we make new beliefs on the experiences we have, we go bitter tremendously, we live in an agitated world, Why?

Why don’t we understand each other, if we do, why people change, just a thought.

We live in an interdependent world, its neither dependent or independent, we all move together, then we move. Just take a look around and we can understand better. How people know different skills and they are working for each other.

I believe we should get to know ourselves better in the silence inside ourselves to know who we are and how we interact and communicate, this is very important to understand all that cause mostly the dynamics are based on that. You cannot expect a person would say kind words if he/she is slapped by you. He/she has the right to hit back. Did you see what just happened? It created a hostile environment. Do we need that? Question for all to answer.

In the organizations there is a new era for managers, which they call as emotional intelligence in which they say that as the first principle, one should know who he/she is. I admire those words and they are true. It just opens one’s eyes on many things, not only on what to do, but on who we are.

Do Feel & Know yourself in the Silence Inside.

http://www.keeptheheartsalive.com

Hope by definition means to cherish, want or desire something. That something can be a tangible or intangible item that one can expect to obtain at some point in time. My immigrant parents transmitted the process of hoping to me at a very early age in my life. I was fourteen years old and living in La Paz, Bolivia, when their hope of providing their children, my brother and I, a better life and education came true. The truth and realization of that hope, that desire or so-called dream was made a reality by immigrating to America. Their hope was driven strongly by their faith in God and the thought that they could make those dreams happen through their strong work ethic and perseverance.

They sold everything they owned in Bolivia, and left their lives behind to afford us the privilege of being educated in America. We left Bolivia with our lives in five suitcases, $50,000 dollars, which back in 1978 was a fortune for middle class working folks, and headed to America, the land of opportunity. My parents spoke no English yet they had the strong hope and desire that we would succeed. Twenty-five years later they are each successful business owners, with two college educated children. They turned their hopes into possibilities and made them a reality, all that with their beginning capital of $50,000. That was my first lesson of transforming hope into possibility. How does one make hopes, dreams or visions into possibilities or realities?

For us in 1978, that hope was transformed into reality by sacrifice, hard work and determination. It was accomplished by doing jobs that no one else would do and studying hard to prove that we as immigrants could succeed. Women who succeeded in my country of birth were a minority because they were not fulfilling the traditional role of a woman. My mother had the hope and the vision that her children would be given a different opportunity. My father chose to follow her dream. Together they defied their traditional roles that had been culturally inbred into them. Together they made a journey that has forever changed their lives. Their lives have been marked with joys and sorrows and an abundant recollection of memories that has set them apart from many of their family members that remain in Bolivia.

As a woman in today’s fierce, competitive society in which we live, there are certain tools that we need to make things happen. Back then ones hopes were made into possibilities by working hard and having a strong determination. Today you also need that strong work ethic and determination; but in addition to that women must also equip themselves with several other tools.

The primary tool is education. Education provides us knowledge and knowledge gives us the ability to make choices to control our future. Education also provides us as women the ability to succeed. As a mother of three children I emphasize education on a daily basis. I am a firm believer that the foundation of promoting good study habits, and instilling the mindset that education is the key to opening many doors should start at a tender age with the simplest forms of study. As a mother, how do I turn the hope that I want my children to have a passion for higher education into a possibility or a reality? I spend time reading with them, to them, and I help them with their homework. I encourage them to try different things that involve the use of their minds. That however requires commitment and consistency. This is a task that cannot be done occasionally or at random. It is a task that has to be done on a continual basis- continuity builds good habits.

The second tool that I believe in and encourage others to use is: knowing how to define your vision, dream or game plan. It is very easy to hope to be a doctor, a military member, a good mother or whatever path we may envision for ourselves, but it can be difficult to attain that goal because we don’t have a road map. How can we get from point A to point B if we do not know the route? I encourage women to set short-term goals and long-terms goals. Those goals should be a detailed plan of how the ultimate vision will be accomplished.

After having successfully completed my bachelor’s degree and working in my career field for several years, I realized that I had always wanted to do something else. So on my thirtieth birthday I made the choice to switch careers. I had a game plan and followed it and continued to educate myself along the way ever since. Making this change set me up for the most fulfilling phase of my life. Making this change also turned my hopes and dreams into a possibility or better yet a reality. That reality for me is being a successful business owner where I am able to be in control of my time and the amount of income I choose to make. This choice gives me the ability to first and foremost be a devoted wife, mother and then an entrepreneur.

The third and most important tool that I use and try to encourage other women to use is sharing my philosophy of the law of reciprocity with them. It is important to grow at all levels, to change and adapt to the different times in which we live but more importantly, to help others grow. The more we help others, the more we continue to grow as individuals and the more fulfilling our lives become. As women this is probably one of the easiest tasks to attain since the law of reciprocity can be applied at all levels of ones life. We should strive to live our lives in a way that we should always be an inspiration to others by our actions, words, and humbleness. Just as watching their parents inspires children, others can at times be inspired by our own actions, however simple they may be. It is these traits that inspire others to follow.

In closing, I can say that fear can be a huge obstacle to overcome at times. It can prevent anyone from accomplishing many things. It is important to believe in ones hopes, dreams or visions and to take that chance to pursue them so that they will turn into possibilities and realities. This means taking ownership of those hopes and dreams. My hope is that I can use my wisdom, knowledge and life experience to help other women grow. My hope is that my humble story will inspire fearful women to want to change and to turn their dreams into possibilities. At the end of the day when all is said and done- none of this would be possible for me with out the strength I gain from my faith in God. It is this faith that gives me the strength to hope, be committed to my goals, and to lead by example. The strength I gain through my faith is what makes it possible for me not to be afraid and to plunge forward. As I put the finishing touches on this essay I realize that I am fulfilling a dream by writing this essay, losing that fear and taking that chance of turning my newest hope into a possibility. Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

Mary Macias-Cox was born in La Paz, Boliva in 1964. She is a graduate from New Mexico State University with a BA in Hospitality and Tourism. At 30 she went on to pursue her life long dream of studying hair design and received her education at Pensacola Junior College. Since then she has traveled extensively as an educator in the hair industry and has taught classes in both Spanish and English. In addition to teaching she has owned her own private hair studio for the last 8 years and is a succesful entreprenuer.
She is a proud military spouse to Rick, a United States Air Force member and mother to Victoria, Diego and Fernando. Currently residing in Omaha, Nebraska, she stills owns her private Hair Studio and is pursuing new public speaking opportunites. Her passion is to educate and empower women of all walks of life. Her dream is to bring a new awarness to mainstream America which is that behind every service member in the Armed Forces there is a family which also sacrificies and serves our country in many ways.